This is the official Gustavo Dore Rodrigues' personal blog, podcast and contact info.ドレ・グスタボのブログ、ポッドキャスト、連絡先。dore@motify.workIt is all about work.

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日本が休暇や病気休暇について学ぶべきこと - What Japan has to learn about Holidays and Sick leaves

日本人のお父さんの写真を見つからなかった。 Could not find a pic with a Japanese dad.



- 夫のやり方:私のふたりの友人は、それぞれ異なる大企業に勤めていますが、似たような生活を送っています。どちらも4歳以下の子供がふたりいます。どちらにも仕事に重点を置いて家庭を放置することに決めた夫がいます。いっぽうの事例は、夫は別の町で暮らし、顔を合わせるのは1、2カ月に1度です。もういっぽうの事例では、夫は出張続きで、同じく家にはほぼ1カ月に1度戻ってきて2、3日居るだけです。どちらのケースも、女性はシングルマザーのように早く帰宅して子供たちの面倒を見ることとの引き換えに、自分のキャリアや生産性を諦めてしまっています。

- 妻を専業主婦のように扱う夫:彼女は自分にもキャリアがあり、夫よりも多く稼いでおり(これは重要です)、そのうえに、ふたりの子供(7歳と3歳)の文字通りすべての世話と、掃除、料理、そして夫の衣服のアイロンがけまでをしているのです。今や調子が狂い始めています。彼女にはくつろいだり、本を読んだり、自分の楽しみ事をしたりする時間がまったくありません。このままの調子でいけば、やがて彼女は枯渇してしまいます。特に精神面で。フラストレーションはたまり続け、不公平だとの思いが彼女を辛辣にし、それが彼女の業績やキャリア上の可能性にまで影響を与えることでしょう。彼女は夫よりもはるかにポテンシャルが高いにもかかわらず、この循環を断ち切ることができない限り高みまで昇ることは望めません。

- 3つの仕事を掛け持つお母さん: 最初の2つの事例ほど一般的ではありませんが、このような事例もあります。夫には何でも自分の望むことをする権限があるため、彼らは家族のためにはあまりならない「見栄えの良い」キャリアを選びます。この事例では、夫は毎晩遅くまで働き、営業のために接待で飲み歩いたりするのですが、ただそれに見合うほどの壮健さを持ち合わせていません。しばらくすると苦悩し始めます。ある特定の事例を紹介すると、ふたりの子供(10歳と7歳)をもつその驚異的な母親は、週末には子供向けの英語教室を開始し、自宅の半分をAirBnB(エアビーアンドビー)に貸し始め、それに伴う掃除や洗濯をすべてこなしたうえで、なおかつ9時から5時までの会社勤めで単純な事務作業をしています。彼女は、キャリアを追い求めるなど自分には荷が過ぎると感じています。身体はへとへとで、精神力も枯渇しようとしています。




What Japan has to learn about Holidays and Sick leaves

The main lesson that Japan has to learn is to make it equal for men and women at home. Yes, at home. The office will come later. Every time a kid gets sick, it is automatically expected that the woman will take the holiday. Every time there is a discussion on what to do related to home matters, it is expected that the women will do. I will tell you 3 cases that really bother me:

- The away husband: 2 of my friends works for different big corporations and they have similar lives. Both have 2 kids under 4 years old. Both have husbands that decided to focus on work and neglect home. In one case, the husband lives in another town and they meet once every 1 or 2 months. In the other case, the husband works traveling and come home also around once a month for 2, 3 days. In both cases the women have given up their career or productivity in exchange to come home earlier and take care of the kids as Single Mothers.

- The husband that treats his wife as a housewife: She also has a career, she makes more money than he does (and that is important), she also does EVERYTHING for both kids (7 and 3 years old) and clean, cook and even iron the clothes for the husband. Now is where it gets trick, she does NOT have time to relax, to read or to enjoy herself. Keeping this way she soon will be running on empty. Specially on the spiritual side. Her frustrations will just grow and her sense of unfairness will make her bitter, which will affect her performance and career possibilities. She has so much more potential than the husband, but will never go very far until she can break from this cycle.

- The 3 job working mom: Not as common as the first 2, but they exist. Since the husband has the power to just to whatever he wants, they choose a “cool” career that does not provide enough for the family. In this case, he works everyday until very late, he goes to drinking to be able to get clients and etc, but he is just not fit for it. After a while they start to struggle. In this specific case, the amazing mother of 2 (10 and 7), started giving English lessons for kids on the weekends, started renting half of their house on AirBnB, doing the cleaning and all laundry, and still has a job from 9-5 at a company in a simple desk job. She feels pursuing a career would be extending herself too much. She feels so exhausted and is also running on empty.

I am sure those similar cases happens everywhere around the world. But in Japan they are "just another Tuesday". It is about belief. I was raised in Brazil in a society that believes in equal opportunities, in a society that women graduate university more often than men, that both partners have equal obligations towards the home unless discussed otherwise.

It is all about input and output. Those 3 women are living on output and not much input. They don’t have time to read, study and improve themselves. Very little time to watch TV, laugh, meet friends and just recharge. Their husbands are doing it and it just feels unfair.

For all husbands in Japan, you need to try harder!

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